An illustrated blog about psychology and relationships.


Satisfying roles in a relationship

An interview with Joanna Dulińska, psychologist, psychotherapist and supervisor at the Process Oriented Psychology Institute (Instytut Psychologii Procesu).

A conversation about what roles are needed in a relationship, how to make changes in a relationship, why people cheat on each other, and many, many other important issues. more ›


Leaving your options open?

Leaving the “door open” or “not burning your bridges” creates a sense of being able to choose.

I love you, but I’m looking around.

But all the options stay as potential choices that are not made. more ›


Breaking up? Not yet…

“After the first phase of being in love, after the feeling that everything is going to be wonderful, it becomes clear, that that’s not what’s going to happen. From this point on, people start to look at each other differently. And this is a fantastic moment! As long as we don’t stay stuck in this place.”

Grażyna Lubińska talks to psychotherapist Mikołaj Czyż about how to fight for a relationship in trouble. Published in Wysokie Obcasy Extra, issue n 9 (30), November 2014.

Labyrinth more ›


Couples who are smitten with each other, again

Do you remember the special time when you first got together? What was it that captivated you? What were you like?


A few years later it’s sometimes hard to remember that you’re still the same people… more ›


Beware! This is not a question!

“How do I look?”

If you want your loved one to give you a compliment, then it’s best to ask for it directly :)


The control trap

“You lead!”

If you want your partner to be “stronger” or “more decisive”, then think about what these words mean to him. When you try to give him instructions, the best you can hope for is an docile student… and that’s not what you’re after!


On stagnation in a relationship

“Be crazy about me!”

What kind of you would you like your partner to adore? Be that person sometimes! more ›


Therapy doesn’t work when…

“I have an idea about how you need to grow as a person!”

Therapy (and life with someone else!) doesn’t work very well when we concentrate mainly on what the other person should change in themselves.


Beliefs that block the development of a relationship

Each couple has their own private set of beliefs, which hold problems in place and make changes for the better much more difficult.

The most common ones include:
more ›


The need for success

These are my photos of dragonflies/ Let’s conquer the world with them!

An intense focus on our partner’s achievements usually means it would be good to focus on our own.